I can understand the rage. It took you too long to say. I already knew there was something wrong with you when my calls were pushed to voicemail without replies. Atleast we all know this from your childhood, that you prefer to be silent when you’re emotionally stressed.
By the way, I am doing very well by the Grace of God. I have just been dealing with an intermittent rise and fall of my blood sugar but Dr Noch has been treating me very well. God bless his kind heart. It hurts to recall how you guys did not make out but anyway…..
Your father says Hi. We read the letter together. Adobeah, to this, I can only say I understand. I understand the pain and rage. I understand how you want to kill him. I understand how you don’t want to play the victim, and I also understand how you want to leave your matrimonial home and come back to your room. I understand – I really understand, but what can I say? Agree that you pack your things and come home? Or join you destroy your husband’s properties and smack his new mistress down? Will I even have the blood pressure to do that?
Will it solve the problem? Will it make me a wise mother? Adobeah, I can only understand the situation and give you the Godly counsel you don’t want to hear. I wish I was that shameless mother to advice you to sign the divorce papers and run home to your loving family, but unfortunately, I can’t and this is why.
When you solemnly declared a “for better or worse”, you really signed up for a situation like this. You agreed that no matter how bitter the moments will be, you will stay true to your words until death do you apart. It is only his death that is suppose to bring you back home to your family.
Let me not be the one to affirm your decisions. I am only your mother but not the chancellor for the marriage institution – God is. Ask Him if he can let you be an exception to what He hates, which is divorce.
Until then, do not leave that house for another woman to occupy. Do not put your own marriage asunder. Pray to God, He has all the keys to a successful marriage. He can guide you to have peace in your marriage again, by His wisdom. He hates divorce so he does everything to build it again.
There is no marriage without a storm. Marriage is not rosy. Marriage is the test of Faith, character and strength.
Denu is a disappointment, I know but do not go down to his level. Show him your sense of integrity and maturity by managing the situation with God. Sometimes men are like children, they easily fall out of love for their favourite toys when they see another. It’s okay to resent him for sometime, it’s okay to cry and scream your voice out. Beat the pillows when you feel like it but do not hold a knife.
Who knows the purpose God has for this situation, even though it does not seem good? You have always longed for a big testimony since childhood, right? Who knows, this could be the Test.
When Nabal provoked David and brought doom upon his family, Abigail managed the situation with Wisdom. She covered her husband’s foolishness with wisdom and peace. She did not nag nor leave the house; she immediately approached David to pacify him with gifts. This stopped David’s anger staying further.
Your father and I made it through the times because of The God in me. I chose to let God. Do you think I never had thoughts of killing him? Twice, Adodeah, Twice! And even the night he beat me till I miscarried an unknown pregnancy. I played the fool and prayed. God drew me closer to Him and gave me the strength and Wisdom to fight my way through. You were there when your father came back crying for our forgiveness. Do you think he suddenly realized?
With God, there is no damage in marriage beyond redemption. Just obey and don’t put asunder. Cry to Him, he will come through for you. But first, forgive him for yourself.
Writing became my great escape after a terrible heartbreak. Unfortunately too, my siblings and i had moved from the family house to an apartment. There was no one to talk to. I could not also talk to them because they were too young to understand and console my accordingly. Every dawn, or morning or even in the evenings, they could hear me sob in my room and always wondered what was wrong with me.
‘’is it because there is no food in the house?’’ Tina would ask. That was also a question I could not answer to make them weak in their faith, so I ignored.
After every cry, I would pour out all my emotions on any piece of paper within my reach. I wrote a lot of poems and articles. Most of the poems exuded hatred and bitterness but the articles were lessons I really felt very urgent to share with vulnerable ladies like myself. That was the start of the eunice Godbless page.
I felt it so strong to write to inform people about life, after God miraculously healed my heart and mind, and gave me a new perspective in life. My new phase took me deeper into The Word of God, and I got to learn God’s mind about Love, Relationships and even choosing His kind of man, like Exodus 18:21, and many other things about life.
After a complete healing, I came to understand that God made a lemonade out of my lemons. My writing were read by many on Facebook and even here, (my previous WordPress account which got locked) and were so blessed and since then, it became a necessity to doing this writing thing even more.
On this site, my utmost goal is to get people to know, understand and accept God’s wonderful mind about every aspect of their lives. I seek to reveal His immense knowledge and wisdom through stories, articles, poems etc. In five years, I seek to be one of the most influential bloggers in Africa bringing life and hope into the hearts of people. A step to this goal, is looking forward to get my contents published on notable platforms, hence taking up these writing challenges to develop contents, share on different platforms while learning how to write on impulse and very well. A step to that is also the connections I am strategically building with people of like same mind, regardless the shores.
..so come, all ye who are burdened and are heavy laden…. for there is no higher calling, no greater honor, than to speak the oracles of God
Today, I finally get to tell you something I have kept away from you for a while. By the way, how are you? I heard the Doctor said the cancer is benign. I jumped for joy upon hearing this because malignancy would have brought the darkness a bit earlier than expected.
What I am about to tell you today may break you but don’t be. Eat if you have not eaten because you may lose your appetite. Drink nothing yet, you may choke on it. You should be done taking your blood pressure medications now, right? I wish you could add another 5 mg of Amlodipine, just in case….
Mum do you remember the night we both cried together on the couch when dad introduced his new mistress? Frank’s death was not even a month’s old. It was exactly 3 weeks he accused him of theft, and chased him around the house, slipped on the tiles and hit his head. On that day, Mummy, why didn’t we leave when he said he was done with us?
Why did you throw yourself at the feet of your fellow woman, who was eager to take your lawful place? Why were you begging her not to break your home as if you had no pride, Mummy? Why did you peacefully agree to step down to be the second wife, and moved to the boys quarters? You were not poor, you were industrious and had your own businesses. We wouldn’t have lacked anything had we left. You could afford a rent and my fees. You even had a house under construction but why did you choose we stay Mummy, why? Was it because of love or the stigma society has for the divorced, or some sort of respect you had for your God?
Why I’m I asking this now?
As I write you this letter, mom, his replica has being in this house for 4 years, but I got to know just three months ago. Denu has another mistress, mum. Denu has two children; two boys; 3 and 2 years. One looking just how I picture our son to be. He has the same deep set eyes like the father, and the same fade haircut, and looks just like him!
So it explains why he has not been worried about our failed conceptions. It explains the sudden change of attitude I spoke to you about. He found himself a new wine, and a fountain to drink from.
I’m hurt mum – deeply. Denu has taken me for granted. I feel like pulling this whole house down. I feel like destroying the chandeliers and his recent Mercedes or strangling him or pouring acid on his fine face or gunning him in the throat or gosh! – I feel like killing Denu, mummy.
Unlike you, I will not cower! I will not beg my fellow woman to leave the man who failed to think of his God-given family for a strange woman. Unlike you, mom, I have a pride and dignity to protect. I did no wrong just as you did no wrong so why should I play the victim?
I did not ask the above questions because I need a reason to stay, but I am asking out of an extreme rage!
Denu has really hurt me, Mummy. He has insulted my faithfulness to the marriage. He disregarded his vows when he lied through his teeth, introducing his mistress as an old colleague. Mum, Denu. The Denu we all worshiped and spoke well of.
As I write you this letter, I already have the divorce papers beneath this writing pad, waiting to sign and in about a week you will see me in the house, again – single – broken – empty!
It’s extreme to stay, mum. Please do not ask me to wait.
Have you ever wondered, like I always do, how our grandparents or elders got the wisdom they quoted as proverbs? Has it ever occurred to you how they got those sayings and how they got them validated? Who even started? Was it through experience or by observation or both? These are pointless thoughts that will only drive you into insanity, but honestly they make me wish I was at the inception of African-ism.
“Look at a life with no guidance from the past, and you are looking at history repeating itself” ~ anonymous
Wow! I mean this is clearly a call to awareness or an awakening to knowledge . A call to be informed about the past experiences to avert recurrence because there nothing new under the sun.
That was just by the way. Now my 5 African proverbs and meaning;
Nyansa nni baakofo) tirim
This means that Wisdom is not found in one person’s head.
Kweku Ananse short lived being the possessor of the whole world’s wisdom. His own stupidity paid his greed, by breaking the pot of wisdom he had in his possession. That was how we all had our share of wisdom. You should read this African folklore.
Living in this life for a while, I have learnt that life is not an experiment, and there is no time to do everything. You need to seek directions and sometimes copy people’s ideas, if they are what you want to become. You need their experience to avert recurrence or to find solace, strength and knowledge to move on. That is why we read books, attend seminars etc… because with your own ideas, you will fail and be limited.
NB: but just be careful what or who’s “wisdom” you expose yourself to.
2. Dua koro gye mmframa aa ebu
This means that if you are a constant recipient of life’s turbulence, you will not thrive. You need help at some points in life. You may have to allow people to step in and be a shield. You cannot be strong or pretend to be strong all the time. You do not have the capacity alone!
To the one in an abusive relationship. Constant brutality (in words or actions) will only break your personality and perception about life. You may even die. It’s too much? You need to get up and leave! Pray and find solace in God. Leave and believe God to help you find your life from His perspective. He will come, and also send comfort. Don’t die stupid.
To the depressed. Suicide is never an option neither is it the end to the pain. It’s just a transit to a worse. Whatever be the situation, have you tried Matthew 11:28 and Psalm 46:1? Do not die without exhausting all help.
3. B33bia )tomfo) b) no, na 3h) hia no.
)tomfo) is a blacksmith. The goal of every blacksmith is to see their craft looking flawless. This is achieved by several hammering into the desired shape. This act is very important to the blacksmith because it gives them the desired results.
To know what someone values or stands for or how they desire to be treated, listen to what they repetitively say or study what they constantly give their time and energy to. You will know how they define flawlessness. This will save a lot of the broken relationships.
4. Y’3soma )ba nyansa fo, na 3ny3 anam)ntenten
This saying means, that you do not send someone because he or she has long legs, but because he or she is wise.
Applying this in your choice of people for work, relationship, etc…. it means, that Wisdom is a principal thing, therefore choose people with wisdom not deserving.
5. )k)t) nnwo anomaa
This means that the crab does not give birth to a bird.
You are where you come from. You resemble your mother or father, because their genes made you up. You cannot find yourself in a corrupt company and not cause the same repercussions. So be mindful where you choose to be.
Have you gained some wisdom? Do you see how important proverbs could be? They give guidance in all facet of life. They can be thought-provoking and also difficult to understand.
Do you love your life? Then give yourself to wisdom and understanding dark sayings – even The Bible!
“Look at a life with no guidance from the past, and you are looking at history repeating itself” ~ anonymous
Waking up that Sunday dawn with our parents not in sight was the start of my early motherhood, and a change no child wants to experience, although we had our grandmother to have and to hold. She embraced us and took us as her own. To be honest, she tried her best to be the parent we needed but she was just not enough and it was not the same as having a mother and a father.
Our grandmother of blessed memory was the best granny we could ever have. Such caring and loving heart we had on our side. I remember a day she cried when she thought the three of us were going to die because of a severe malaria. Amazingly, we fell sick the same day. Thank God we did not die.
She cooked for us, cleaned and escorted us to school. It was a nice experience walking by her side holding her hand, and bouncing with such confidence but having grandmother take care and nurture us was not same as our father’s strong voice and presence in our lives. It was not the same as having a role model to look up to and having the family bond. It was not the same as having the person ‘mama’ to call on for something or nothing at all, in case you want to be silly. The discipline was entirely different. She was only strong on getting us to stay indoors, but not in doing our assignments, nor the times we had to go to bed. We were just living our lives freely, with little accounts to make. But let’s understand – it was not her fault.
Some time after our parents traveled to Germany, it became very clear at a point, that I had to induce my growth to deputize her in the motherly duties. The responsibilities were taking a toll on her. At age 5, and the first born of then two siblings (now 7), I started doing the laundry of my sisters and that of her’s. I started joining a neighbor to the market to get foodstuffs for dinner. I started helping my grandmother prepare soups, stews and everything African she prepared. Even though I did not like cooking, I had to love it for my siblings’ sake – as becoming their ‘mother’.
Not only did I had to enjoy and endure the heat in the kitchen for us, becoming a ‘mother’, taught me toughness. It nurtured in me a sense of duty and made me responsible. I learnt how to love in the midst of hurts. I had to learn how to multi-task. Worse of all were the classes I had to miss to be with them at the canteen, to eat or settle a fight they started. Sandra would always come calling my name from outside my class at odd hours with her spiky-messy hair, dirty shoes and uniform which ended on her ashy-looking knees.
Today I am glad that I took up the challenge. It’s been a journey but worth trying. It is what has made me what I am today. Like being thoughtful of my actions, deep in thoughts, and focused in life, and having the sense of decency – I had to be an example – a model leader. That’s also how I learnt how to be antisocial and very distant, having no expectations of anyone. This is it; it has been a journey of being strong alone. I grew up not having anyone to look up to nor be there for me. My grandmother was, but something was still missing.
Amidst all these lessons, I have had failures too. Time will fail me to tell you about the Medical Doctor I could not become because I failed my exams. The confusion on who I want to be still lingers daily. Sometimes it is frustrating, because I feel late but His Grace makes me believe otherwise. I believe in one scripture,‘’that all things WORKS together for good, to them that love the Lord and are called according to his purpose’’. Amidst the confusion, His Grace convicts me that I am the called so I take each day one at a time building on my strengths, and the gift of writing He has endowed me with. Who knows, maybe this is it – the purpose – to write to inspire.
Back at home in Kumasi, there was this handsome boy in my area who every girl was crushing on, including myself. He lived four houses across mine, and could hardly be seen in the area playing with the other boys; he was always home or outside sitting on their wall with some other guys chatting. He was about 13 or 15 years I think but liked the company of adults and you could see the reflection of that maturity in his behavior and how he spoke. He also had this nerd look although he was without a lens. A reflection of his intelligence was noticed from his fluency in the English language and how well he could choose and combine dictions. He had those big bags for school and his black shoes were always polished and shiny and had a sincere, true white socks – never off white like yours when you were in the Junior high.
Every teen knew Mr Quophi; an extreme prim and proper old man you could not enter his gates at a certain time of the day. He had his life standards so high that no one could measure up to him. His house stood out in the area – a two storey building with nice painting and flower plant decorations. It was not a surprise to have people admire it twice and even tenth time but when he catches you, he may probably ask you to stand right there for interrogations because you’re a thief that very moment until proven otherwise. Ho! He was really someway. It was the only house we couldn’t pluck mangoes. He will intentionally close his back gate and release his dogs if you try using there as a short route to the football park. He was really wicked, but he had a lovely son called Kofi – my crush – my clash!
Kofi was the guy every girl desired to date then. Well I can’t say for now cos it’s been years. He had an amazing swag from the other guys and always looked sharp in his colored polo shirts. You could not look at him twice and pass, you’ll obviously steal glances again. He had a very nice eyes with a smoky eye lid. Everything in his face looked proportional to the other; Pointed nose, equal lips – nude colored lips and the diastema made his face handsome to behold.
The first time I loved Kofi was on one evening when he passed a kind comment about my complexion and hairdo when I met him on my way home from the saloon. Prior to that, it was the ‘well I love him but couldn’t tell’ kind of thing. We were not even acquainted to start with. The comment was straight forward but the girl was so excited to have that come from her all time crush! You know what I mean. So I decided to demand an explanation just to prolong the conversation. I needed this time with him because It was all I longed for because na )d) no ataa me aky3! Ad3n? (Meaning I was so heads over heels in love with him). He kept saying one thing, “you should understand” but I refused to. The explanation led to another question and another question and boom! We were almost two hours gone. We spoke and laughed and confessed our sentiments. I could not believe my eyes that I was talking to Kofi. I felt privileged knowing I’m the second girl he’s spoken to. The girls who passed by at that time (around 6pm) with their refuse bin looked whispering to themselves about us: the same jealousy people show towards those who achieve their dreams. I was not surprised.
The favorite part was the anticipation for something more when Kofi finally admitted he liked me.
“I thought you never did!”I exclaimed “well yeah, maybe I didn’t want you to know. Because I have noticed how the girls behave towards the guys when they ask them out. I find it very pathetic but I think you’re different”
I could scream! My heart was dancing and my mind felt like bursting out! My eyes were watering, I could not help it. It was typical of those moments you wish were forever. The feeling was very sensational and the atmosphere was too right. Everything around us felt so much alive. I was numb to the cold weather and the mosquitoes that were sucking my blood. We sat right in front of a smelly-choked gutter but I smelled nothing.
Somewhere around 7pm, we saw Maame Nyarko heading towards Kofi’s house and he perceived she was after him so he asked for his leave. It was just a peg oo and he left. “Kofi” he turned on my call but I felt it was too early to ask that question so I paused “….. never mind. Hope we meet again. Goodnight”. He turned and left while my heart was screaming out for him as he headed out. Maame Nyarko suddenly became an enemy.
I realized Maame Nyarko was the only girl Kofi spoke to and played with – almost frequent. I wondered why. She was not any pretty special kind of girl too; she was a skinny colored girl with “squirreled -ears” who was in the same school with him and lived adjacent his house. I spoke better than she did, dressed better and walked better than she did. Although I was convinced through our conversation that I’m one different girl on his list, I still felt I was in competition with her.
They spoke too often and were escorts on each other’s errands. I didn’t understand and I felt Jealous! On several occasion I felt like screaming “Kofi is my boyfriend so stay off” to her so she understands but I could not because he just said he liked me not be my girl with the pleasure to say YES! My decision to help her understand our relationship led to a tragedy, one that I regretted instantly but I laugh over it today. It brought down the remarkable impressions he had about me and ended the beginning of a love story. You’re wondering what I did? Of course I told her to stay off! Kofi heard. Kofi got bored. The love turned into hatred.
THE DAMN END!!!
I could still remember the disdainful look he gave me when he met me at the back of his house one afternoon after school; I had myself all soiled up with dirts. It had rained that afternoon and had a mud splash on my uniform and body by a reckless driver.
Kofi became entirely bitter towards me but ironically, how he treated me, made me love him more. He became the wind I could feel but never catching in an embrace.
Every great, mighty and deep thing always has a small beginning. The growth always depends on the foundation. If the foundation is firm and strong, its ability to hold or retain what ever is built on, is sure.“ Before dating, I never got to understand why David, my husband, was so careful entering into a relationship with me. I thought he didn’t like me but wanted to hold unto me. My principles wouldn’t agree so we fought a couple of times. I wanted to end this whole friendship with benefits thing but he still insisted we build our beautiful friendship to prove compatibility. “for how long Dav?” I yelled at him anytime we had the relating issue. He is too slow, I thought. But, he always had his plan and principles. I remember the day he took me to his construction site and walked me closer to the tallest project they have ever done. He pointed and said, “look there, that’s the most challenging project we have ever made. Laying the foundation costs the company billions of cedi’s but its hidden, no one knows about it and no one can see the treasure we have casted beneath this building. It stands tall today because of the investments we made in the foundation. And that’s how I want to build our relationship if we would ever get married”. Well truth be told, I was totally ashamed, confused and excited. I thought the aftermath was the long awaiting proposal but no, he simply was trying to get me to understand what it will take to build a strong, rain-proof, wind-proof relationship. And it was all about having a good, well built foundation. Our foundation is God and our true friendship and by His Mercies and Grace, He has kept our wine better till this day”. Mrs. Appiah.
The beginning of every good and eternal thing has its tough and toughest times. Survival is imminent if its foundation was on solid grounds. The beginning of an eternal life, Ministry, a height in Christianity, happy marriage, obedient children, fulfilled life has the Fear of God as its basic foundation; its the acknowledgement given to God that He is sovereign and that He is all Knowing and Intelligent to reign wholly on earth through our lives.
God cherishes humble and small beginnings. This explains why He always raises His beloveds from zero to hero. Rarely would you hear God doing something with the high and mighty. Even if He would, He always humbles them to take their hearts and minds off themselves to focus totally on him and His sufficient Grace. Its His preparation to install in them His Kingdom intelligence – His Wisdom. And it always starts with the Fear of God. This is the beginning to having access to God’s divine Intelligence. Its the small beginning of being able to stay humble to retain His Instructions in your heart and apply them with Diligence and effect. This is a true statement that if we apply our hearts to it, we will build the greatness of our Ministry, Marriages, Child raising, Finances, Education, Profession, Talents and Gifts, and Relationships with no strength of ours.
There is no height or a finished course without Wisdom. Its the highest spiritual Intelligence every true Christian is called to operate in and Is the greatest gift man can ever have. ‘She’ has every good thing the hearts of men seek to make their life meaningful as ‘Her’ reward for those that seek her. Entirely generous and rewarding if only we are willing to yield to God because ‘she’ has everything it takes to bring one’s life to a successful end. Just one word or direction then you are on your way to finding meaning to true life.
What then is Wisdom? Its the true intent( His mind) God has concerning everything His hands every made. Its not ancient proverbs. Its His WORD; The Spirit behind His revealed Word. Its The Spirit that rests upon you with power to practically execute plans as God would if He were to be on earth. Wisdom is totally devoid of self that’s why throughout the bible there is a simple word as “COME”. Come to me, Come and Listen, Come and buy, Come lets reason together etc. etc. Until you come to accept Christ, come to fear Him, come to Fellowship with Him, come to Seek Him, Come to hear Him, you walk on earth dead and as a fool.
God does not need us to play Christianity by fasting and praying though He requires these as Godly exercises to humble our hearts before Him. He always stress on The Little things like COME and LISTEN. That’s the greatest need of every father from his wards. To always be around him and listen. Not just these, but obeying at the end. Its His greatest wish that we come, listen and exchange all our worries for His Wisdom and the resultant peace.
My Child, LISTEN to what I say,
TREASURE my commands within you
TUNE your ears to wisdom
CONCENTRATE on understanding (proverbs 2:1-4)
Proverbs 2 gives out the four (4) clear principles to attain this Wisdom from God and they are;
1.LISTEN;give heed to His Word and The voice of The Holy Spirit
2.TREASURE;; value His Word in your life. let His Word Form the central part of your life
3.TUNE;always be willing to be in the realm where He can speak to you
4.CONCENTRATE;focus on getting deep insight into His Word to guard your life.
Don’t think you have attained when you begin to see glimpse of it. Its progressive. The depth is saved for the matured but still teachable because hardly is a treasure given to a child. It will be destroyed. Let’s check that.
We won’t ever attain any excellence whether Spiritual or Physical without Wisdom. So BUILD TO THE HEIGHT OF WISDOM!
turn at My rebuke,
Surely, I will pour My Spirit on you
I will make My Words known to you
proverbs 1 vrs 23
So far, in my few years in life, I have come across 47 books and countless articles about love and what it means to fall in love, but I’ve just read a few. I’ll give a low rating to most because as common as they are and have been read by the majority, it still does not address the heart of the issue of what love is, and what it really means to fall in love.
After rating them as best selling books, Many hearts keep breaking each day, spouses file for divorce every minute. Its getting to severity. I thought knowledge was all we needed to make love and marriages work in our lives. Very disappointing.
I realized that many of these writings about love were from personal experiences which were very informative because realities were well spelt out and easy to relate with, but fairly not enough. They all had definitions from what they interpretate as love but not what love truly stands for.
I find solace in Dr. Gary Chapman’s books about love. Very classic and recommendable to all who ever want to have a peaceful and happy love life. He addresses love from its roots by first pointing you to the source. He raises the awareness that you need a “self-killing” before the source (God) to make it to the point of loving the right way, and to enjoy the full beauty of love.
“Marrying Eddy, I had to make great sacrifices I thought were unfair to make. I was very selfish and always demanded to be treated right. I saw how my dad treated my mum; with great respect and esteem. And I thought I deserved nothing less than that. My parent’s marriage was the model marriage I desired to have. Anytime I tried introducing bits of my observations from my parent’s, Eddy would just step on the sand mould I try to build and the sea would wash it away. It became a great stress in my life and I was regretting already. I suddenly thought I had made the wrong choice. To divorce? No, I did not think I had that courage to hold that destructive pen one day standing side by side with him, or out of his sight. I just couldn’t bear those thoughts
I woke up to night cries and misery after we fight ourselves to the point of extreme hatred and retard to sleep. But deep within, I loved him dearly. I felt terrible.
Then Karen came through with a dream she had about my marriage. She said “the end was death. You held your husband at the neck strangling him to death. Even the tears of you son could not stop you”.
It was quite a lengthy description, but I only remember this. It was actually the truth in my heart actually. I realized I needed a divine help. Not even a psychiatrist. She agreed to introduce me to someone who had solutions to my problem. “I don’t do medicine, Karen” I said protectively. She laughed till she couldn’t no more. She took me to church and introduced me to Christ .
I became born again and was encouraged to find a Bible believing church to attend. I had no where in mind so I decided to join them. God became active in me and took me through series of change. From my character down to my appearance. I had to let go of my self to let God rule in my bitter times. I totally became a transformation. Eddy noticed it but he failed to acknowledge. Thoughts were running through his mind but his ego would not make him admit.
To cut things short, God saved me, Eddy and our marriage. Its been 30 years since we got marriedand love, has never stopped being our lifestyle because we gave it all to God”.Alice
Love is beautiful and sweet when you find the right person they say. But Love is the greatest stress ever put on man. we play it as if it’s the easiest game we can ever handle. Riding on feelings, physiques, riches, social status, fear of delay, ignorance, pressure and blindly jump into relationships and marriages and later go like OUCH, I should have given it some time. These secret words in the hearts of many spouses, beloveds are the reason behind the wickedness people do to the other when they fall out of love and make love lose it sweet savour in our lives. After this realization, the married man or woman bitterly acknowledges the “sweetest” mistake he or she has ever made. He or she seeks an out but for some reasons, decides to stay but makes sure the other party suffers dearly for it. Its a silent fight for freedom but very hard to voice out. It will raise suspicion and make the tension worse hence, the silent treatment. The “wise” partner tries to figure out and finally deciphers the code. Divorce papers finally signed at the end. So then my question stands,WHAT MADE YOU FALL IN LOVE?
If its anything built outside eternal value, then separation is imminent. Understand this, that love is like diving into the heart of a sea or any water body. You don’t lunch in soaring on your own breath and movements. You have to give up and take another form to be able to fit into that “World”. You need a different make over by simply dying to your normal self to accept another. You need to give up your selfishness and principles to tolerate another if you truly want to dive deeper into the world of the other. You cant be in the depth of the sea and still be missing out on how the world looks like. Something must have persuaded you to go that deeper. So stay. And You surely must know how to control the waters ( emotions)
All the people who ever got drown in a water body was because they;
a. Still wanted to move in their normal realm
b. They didn’t know how to control the water.
Many of us don’t know anything about emotional intelligence and maturity. We hardly invest in it to muster. We don’t know how to control this “water” to keep us in a steady flow in our relationships. We prove the worse of it by saying“ITS OKAY”but will still be the reasons behind our funny actions. We fight with the waves for our rights. We do not easily give up till we are heard and proved right. But has anyone prevailed against the sea? The ability of a lady or a man to muster his or her emotions and to take hold of it, is the greatest maturity.
The foundation of everything has always been God. Believe it or not. Anything God sets His hands in prevails. To Love, to love the right way i mean, is to first maximize the object of love – God in your life by learning about him and knowing Him. He first calls you into a relationship with Him to taste of His Love and its elements and walks in with you into another’s life, holding your hands to teach you how to love the right way. To the young man, he tells him His love is not an open Zip and lying tongue but its Patient and its Truthful. To the Lady, He tells her that His Love is not a loose Jean or skirt, an ignorant mind, money, or desperation but its Patient, hopeful and temperate. It constrains us unto good things. To the wife He teaches that love is not nagging, stingy or cardaveric sex, unyielding, but its humble, considerate, wisdom and supportive. To the husband, He says, that your love is true if you do it as unto yourself.
To really say you have fallen in love, is first to love by vision. Its to look at the person with sentiment because you see something wonderful taking place or something wonderful God is doing in the person and you are excited to be part of it. Its the long term vision of hope and greatness that excites you to be enduring, longsuffering, temperate, loving, supporting, humble, kind, loyal, selfless, truthful with this person. You are so much convinced within your heart that a journey with him or her, will also help you to finding your purpose on earth. You find his or her character a perfect match for your life and purpose, obviously not overlooking his or her “evil”, but are things you think you can tolerate because there is nothing like an ideal partner.
Love is truly beautiful and should never be underestimated or ill spoken off because it has done us more good than harm. It has changed lives and brought nations together. It binds different backgrounds together everyday and mixes blood where boundaries were drawn.
Love, is the reason behind your life today. The greatest love of all time, came down on us from heaven. Receive Him first before your best.
school and knowledge – they are different masters”
I recently read some articles that bled my heart. They were not the usual ‘hear-says, or ‘hear-write’ ( if there’s a word like that) articles written by ignorant bloggers. They were truths from people who had had encounters with what they talked about, with no dilutions. They spilled out the sincerity of their emotions as served by their encounters. I could feel the disappointments of that Zambian and Kenyan media personnels who came across sincere Caucasians who told them hard truths about the Ignorance of their leaders and how it in turn affects them – in everything.
“The average white man in the gutters, cleaned up and sent to your part of the world will always feel superior over the richest African” said a white man. The Zambian was mocked when he tried to protest against the hard truth but the man pardoned his ignorance and simply adviced him to swallow it. “I am not sorry to hurt you Mr, we rule your minds and your countries with our KNOWLEDGE and CREATIVITY. Mention just two things that has no touch of the white man’s creativity? Even the machines you use in your farms are produced by us and we determine the price of each product on the market. Tell me it’s not true. You people are dumb and greedy! You sleep in poverty muds and no one seems to care. You offer multimillion accommodations for the whites because you always think the white man will solve your problems for you but we drain you into poverty. When will you people rise up and turn to your countries? I doubt you would because it won’t be easy subduing corruption. I question the make up of your brains. You know how to fight and kill for power but we don’t. The white man’s only focus is to make his world easy and powerful through KNOWLEDGE” He said. It seemed insulting as I couldn’t swallow them hard enough myself but they were truths told the hard way. All I kept asking myself was, Is Ghana inclusive of their observations or it was generalized?
I come from a part of the world where if you are not a medical student, a law student or an Engineering student, you are not deemed intelligent. Meanwhile Malaria and other health issues flaunts around with pride, insulting the health status of the society. These “intelligent” medical practitioners will just sit in consulting rooms with white coats prescribing medications, missing out on the pattern of cases that presented themselves which could have been an interest for a study. Various chapters of health issues have been reviewed at various conferences and greedy men make impressions that there is no endemic cases in the country. The Mechanical engineer who completed with a First class honors also fails to apply the knowledge acquired to produce a car. Not to talk of the Civil engineer who can not construct good roads for his own country. Meanwhile, they wrote projects reviewing literatures to measure their good understanding of their course, proposing solutions to curb a menace. It can be very easy getting a distinction, with the breakthrough concealed.
In my part of the world, creativity has never been part of us. We are not challenged to be innovative. We are challenged to pass exams with distinction and write application letters for employment. We have been psyched to look up to the white man for everything. They duly deliver and even retain us to call on them next time. Meanwhile, we studied similar courses in schools. We got distinctions, maybe they just passed but the difference is that they retained their knowledge to use it for development. Scientists are called into researches, Engineers are called into creative buildings, etc while we chew, pour, pass and forget.
Could it be, that our education system is like a heavy yoke tied around students neck and always seek early relief with hope of not being entangled again, so we give up on anything learning? We have still not manufactured cars yet we have mechanical engineers. We still have not curbed malaria and other health issues yet we have public health personnels. We still can’t produce quality drugs, yet pharmacists flaunts around marketing brands made in India, Germany, America etc.
Let’s take a tour to the various offices or basements of university departments and take projects by project or thesis by thesis and we will be amazed to find great ideas put together to bring massive improvements. They have been scored – given highest marks and even low and that’s it – concealed
The western worlds give full scholarships to use us to embark on research projects, to even expose us to various problems and solutions with the aim of helping us contribute our quota to the development of our country on our return, yet we have not improved! We don’t even have the zeal to implement because we return back to the mediocre influence where there is no room for innovations and gather excellent words on papers as applications for jobs when we could have created one, making our world a better place.
My name is Eunice and I am no different from this disappointment but I have resolved to CREATIVITY!
Imagine the scene at Caesar’s palace;
The crowd, the scribes and the Pharisee’s hoarding loud out of fury,
For a reluctant weight to be beared by a Heaven’s Duch,
Soldiers sharpening their swords. Parents leaving the wards. Scribes defending their philosophy. Pharisee’s guarding the religion entrusted by their forefathers…….. crowds shouting Condemnation.
To them, that was Godliness,
And must be heeded with no lowliness.
My heart broke, as i watched him defendless of Himself,
And the whole earth judging his case,
He looked to be a man of a difference;
Meek. Gentle. Righteous. Unfit for disgrace,
But he was caught for blasphemy, when he announced his Citizenship without a covered face,
He was bruised. Beaten. Wounded all over the face.
My heart showed the grimace
and turned the tear which rolled in my eyes as i imagined myself in His place in a few years to come or not at all – a condemnation from my very people.
At least, i was guilty of murder, as charged
but this man, i saw no fault.
I stood there, counting the wages of my judgement,
Then suddenly i heard my accuser’s shouting my innocence.
I inquired properly with all curiosity,
and was told, that i had a replacement;
A criminal whose sin bears a great weight more than mine,
“Ha! then crucify him” i said
With no pity and a reflection of how i was just some few moments back, and judged
My chains broke loose, my yoke totally felt light and taken
By a man the people thought was fooling.
But, Little did i know, that, That was actually Christ,
Intentionally Orchestrating time to die that i may rise,
With his blood the price,
And his love the dice,
To clean the opponent’s remarks and finally take me home to relax,
Who am i, to catch God’s eye without a reprimand?