- Learning to say NO
Back in Kumasi, Ghana, where I spent most of my childhood and teenage years, I had this amazing friend called Gifty. We were both 10 year old’s but she was podgy and curvy than I was. People always thought she was older and would want to relate with her more than my tiny self. Gifty was the ‘’Johnny is everywhere’’ in North Suntreso. She was known in every house for her boldness and loudness, and the special kindness she had towards the new mothers who needed baby sitters. She was that sweet and kind, but..
Gifty Anderson-Mayern, although young and kind was not the usual kid you could command around. She was the kind who knew who and what was good for her circle, and could effortlessly say NO without apologies, regardless. It was quiet disturbing for the adults who always wanted her on errands because it is unfit for an African child to refuse an adult’s errand unless told otherwise, yet her mother severally denied having anything to do with those straight answers. It was far from being rude or stubborn, she was just firm and knew how to use her time and energy even at that age.
Some people like myself, still find it difficult saying NO to things and people deserving. Unlike Gifty, we are afraid of the stigma it brings, the opportunities and the acceptance we stand to lose. But let’s be honest with ourselves, do we have the capacity for everything outside our chief work? How long do we seek to please the insatiable humans?
We already have our life’s purpose as a puzzle to unravel as sojourners. We can only be focused to finding it and being committed to achieving it. We can only accept what is in line and pass on what is not to people deserving. We can only embrace the people in line and walk pass those not. It is not cruelty neither does it mean we cannot extend hands of help where necessary, only if it does not clog our grand duties.
Saying NO sometimes can be healthy. It shows no cruelty nor selfishness even when you are in the capacity to. It only shows how strong you are on your priorities. And sometimes it is your peace and your genuineness. Let’s not be inundated with the dislikes of people who may never understand us. Pleasing people all the time only make us stupid, and not believing in God and ourselves.
‘’We must say NO not only to the things which are wrong and sinful, but the things pleasant, profitable, and good which hinder and clog our grand duties and our chief work. What are those ’pleasant’, profitable, and good things for you?’’ – Anonymous
© 2021 eunice Godbless
eunice Godbless 